45 Minutes in the Life of a Corporate Worker

Every single month, I dread the moment when I know I can no longer delay preparing my Corporate American Express Report for electronic signature and processing. This month, I decided I would share the 45 minutes I spent on this project today.

How to Submit an American Express Report in 10 Steps:

Step 1: Go to American Express website and attempt to log in. Forget online password. Try three different permutations, get locked out of account. Swear loudly.

Step 2: Reset password, log in, and know that this will happen again next month too. Begin foraging for cookies in the kitchen.

Step 3: You need to find last month's report so that you can copy-paste your new statement details into the Last Known Successfully Submitted Report (LKSSR). Realize that you don't know where that report is and begin googling Sent Mail and randomly opening nested folders and wonder why on earth you have set up such a complicated nested folder structure.

Step 4: While searching hard drive for LKSSR, frantically try to figure out how you will attach electronic copies of printed receipts using the kitchen table and iPhone. Find LKSSR and congratulate yourself for remembering to "Save As" immediately so that you don't overwrite your LKSSR like you did last month.

Step 5: Copy-paste data from statement into report. It works! Try not to get too excited because you can't find one of your receipts for a purchase over $25.00.

Step 6: Wrack your brain thinking about where you last saw the receipt for the hotel internet connection -- desk drawer? At the office? Suitcase? Computer bag? Begin keening in your head: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Step 7: Find receipt. Once again, restrain sense of accomplishment and excitement because next it's time to use iPhone app JotNot to convert photo of receipt to PDF (because you're working at home today and don't have access to the Fancy Photocopier/Printer/Scanner machine that should also be able to create this entire Amex report AND make coffee for you but does not. Alas).

Step 8: Succeed at creating PDFs of receipts on the FIRST TRY. Start to get excited. Realize that you still need to compose the email requesting approval for charges and try to remember the exact format of the Subject line. If the subject line is not in the EXACT FORMAT REQUESTED BY FINANCE DEPARTMENT it will be rejected. This means no stray commas or spaces. Think dark thoughts about the finance department and contemplate eating more cookies.

Step 9: Complete draft of email. Triple and quadruple check the Subject line of the email to ensure that it will meet strict compliance standards. Before clicking "Send" remember to attach both the Amex report and all 3 receipts. Remember that instead of sending receipt attachments that say "Doc-3_4_11 1_19 PM-page-2.pdf" you need to rename all the receipts to something more descriptive. Wonder why you even care.

Step 10: Send email for approval at last. Calculate amount of time spent on endeavor: approximately 45 minutes. Decide to go for a walk and consider work done for the day.


UPDATE: My report was accepted with this caveat: "Please note we need you to state the amount in the body of the email. I'll take this one, but please make sure it's done going forward."